L--R Sisters: Janell, Karla, Beverly
As for me...I figure I can do other things. I'm not sure I ever fully appreciated all the labor and long hours my mother spent preparing for holiday meals. She used to tell us her daily routine when she was preparing Thanksgiving meal. You know...Monday: "Well, I have my celery all chopped and tomorrow I'm going to do my onions and peppers." We always knew that the day before Thanksgiving was all about "cornbread day." I never knew why...until she was gone and I found out that you need to make it the day before and "let it sit." I'm not sure what it is sitting for, but you must let the cornbread sit...what for, to go stale and hard? Everybody who makes cornbread stuffing says you let it sit (and not just a bit...but overnight)!
Just the other day I asked my aunt: "Where ARE all those wonderful recipes for what you all made?" In their heads...that is where! She did tell me that my grandmother's pie crust recipe used to be on the Crisco can. Well, who's bought Crisco in 30 years? Not this girl...just picking it up would probably cause a 5 lb. weight gain. But, low and behold, in the market yesterday I peaked and by golly, there it was...on the Crisco can. I put it back quickly on the shelf for fear of people actually seeing me LOOK at Crisco...I mean who eats shortening? Besides the little dough boy has made that task much easier, it's definitely an edit to the Crisco pie crust and life seems to be about Easy and Edits. At least that is how I see it. Take this route...no that doesn't work, back up and go a different route.
My life seems to be an ongoing movie script (and there has been a time [over the last 5 years, a friend and I were going to write a screenplay] but then we would have had to change the names to protect the guilty, so...only knowing the beginning and the middle...we never took it to the end. But we liked the idea...we could control exactly how we wanted it to end. Perhaps I need to call my friend Linda, that little ray of sunshine, and see if she's interested again...I'm the one with the vivid imagination and she's the writer.
As I wrote to a friend this morning, we only have the ability to look at what works, or doesn't work for us, and edit or change our life, accordingly. I find it quite challenging at times to reinvent or edit my life, but it can be extremely self-empowering. Noone else can edit my life...I guess they could try, but I'm the one that has the choices to make and I can accept the script I've written or I can choose to reinvent and edit my life to a life that's fulfilling for me and hope that the people in my life benefit.
Sometimes it's not easy making changes or editing my life script...I've certainly done it more times than I've wanted but it keeps getting better. I know that I'm responsible for the change to bring about improvement and fulfillment and work toward the life that makes me happy.
Sitting at this computer and writing about it is so much easier...wouldn't it be great to just use the backspace key, or erase a line of text, start over and BOOM...all is changed. Not so easy. Recently, I told a friend I didn't carry around baggage...that I traveled fairly light. My boys raised, their educations' complete, on their own...its only me to worry about. Yeah, right!
We all carry around baggage and sometimes clutch to it like some one is going to snatch it away from us and own it as their own. Most people I know just tend to hold on to their own...not worrying about someone else's baggage. You know those unhealthy, often times negative thoughts about a past relationship...maybe not so great in looking back...in fact, probably unhealthy...and there we clutch our baggage for way too long. I'm working to let go...move on, rewrite and take out of that baggage those things that just didn't suit me and take the good to the next chapter of my life. My cousin reminsced recently about her college days when she was dating her "to be husband of 40+ years." How he would come around, call and talk and then disappear! They would talk and talk and then she wouldn't hear from him for a while. When she asked him about it..."where do you go?" His response was" Well, we talked so much you filled me up...didn't have anything to talk about for a while." I never looked at it like that. There he was this All American Basketball Player, the ultimate jock with such words of wisdom. What a positive way of telling a person what they do to "fill that empty space" in their life. Helping to bring fulfillment and happiness to another's life.
When we take out the stressful activities in our life or disassociate ourself from people who drain our energy and JUST LET GO of the baggage that doesn't fit us anymore, we have lots and lots of empty spaces and can fill those spaces with anything we like. It leaves lots of places for positive people and experiences, healthy relationships and friendships, more laughter and a lot of love. Deeper friendships, healthier and loving relationships, seeking out adventure over tedium (hey, I went hiking not long ago...something I said I didn't do and I loved the whole experience). You would have thought I was climbing a mountain...it instilled in me a confidence I didn't know I had and replaced a moment in my time, an empty place that I didn't realize was there, and filled it with a relaxing sense of accomplishment when I might otherwise have been fretting or putzing about accomplishing little.
On this Thanksgving day, I am thankful for my life, all of my family and my friends who are a positive, loving force in my life. They know who they are, they have brought me such love and laughter, many moments of joy and they continue to add to every chapter of my life.
I'll continue to make changes, hoping they are always for the better, that I become a better person and and fill those empty spots with a love for life, thankfulness and wisdom, in the hopes that I can give back to those who have given so much to me and my life.
Happy Thanksgiving to all.
~Babs
