Happy Valentine's Day

Robert Frost once said "there is a time for departure, even when there is no certain place to go." Is he is speaking to our journey of life, as it was meant to be lived? That's what I think. Life is a journey, and we should remember that as we go through life; live it in the moment. What about loving in the moment? For what it is now, not what it should have been or could be...but now. In this electronic world where we are all connected electronically, a personal "feature components," as humans, is our love-ability. We love to love it, we love to give it, receive it, talk about it, we write music about it and yes, sometimes we lose it...but there's definitely something we cannot do and that is...live without it. In our heart of hearts, I think we all love, it's just more natural for some than it is for others and I think we all love differently and love a variety of things in our life. It's Valentine's Day and there was a special lady in Minnesota who, on a very cold visit there, told me about the love of her life. She gave me a wonderful outlook on life that I think of often: "Look out the windshield, not in the rear view mirror." I remember that phrase a lot on my journey and I often wish I didn't look back but I have many wonderful memories of Valentine's Day and special loves so on this special day I am looking back reminiscing about the different types of love. Puppy Love, First Love, Eternal Love, Parental Love, Sibling Love, Friendship Love, Love of Sports, Love of Pets...get it? Personally, I don't think love should be about who loves you, but who you love. It's a day of accounting and making certain that those people who are in our lives know they are special, recognized and know that we love them regardless of any "return on investment" in this day of television and other media blasting us with econonic news. I've read several theories of Saint Valentine's Day and there are varying opinions as to it's origin. Some say it originated from St. Valentine, a Roman who was martyred for refusing to give up Christianity. He died on February 14, 269 A.D., the same day that had been devoted to love lotteries. Legend also says that St. Valentine left a farewell note for the jailer's daughter, who had become his friend, and signed it "From Your Valentine." Others say that Saint Valentine served as a priest at the temple during the reign of Emperor Claudius. Claudius then had Valentine jailed for defying him. In 496 A.D. Pope Gelasius set aside February 14 to honor St. Valentine. Over time February 14 became the date for exchanging love notes and St. Valentine became the patron saint of lovers. The date is marked by sending poems and simple gifts such as flowers. In the United States, Miss Esther Howland, built a successful business in her home of Worcester, Massachusetts with handmade Valentine cards that were based on British models. Worcester, Massachusetts reminds me of an Eternal Love of a very special couple. My cousins, Bob and Norma. I was the flower girl in their wedding, little white socks and all. Theirs was a marriage that lasted decades...something to be admired and revered in this day and age. Norma, my shiny and bright cousin, and her beloved Bob, who was adored by many, now has a gymnasium named after him, had a marriage as solid as the rocks of South Texas. He was from Worcester, Massachusetts and being the small town Texas girl that I am, I thought Worcester was some far away land when Norma introduced our family to this ruggedly handsome, well over 6'2", fellow. He was born on Oct. 8, 1937 to a wonderful Polish family. Bob was a HUGE basketball player and won the City championship his senior year in high school and was All-New England Conference 1st Team. Can you believe he worked in the Brown Shoe Factory, (Buster Brown Shoes which Norma actually wore)? Basketball brought him to San Antonio, Texas with a 4 year BasketBall scholarship at Trinity University. During his Freshman year at Trinity, he traveled to Texas City for the Christmas holidays with a friend, a football player for Trinity. Norma was a Senior at Texas City High School that year and was planning to attend Trinity University in the fall. As Norma would say: "Now don't tell me that God doesn't polish us up and get us ready for a life's journey to meet, fall in love, and marry our true soul mates." That they did. They had quite a journey together and she did A LOT OF THE DRIVING...at least in the beginning of their journey. Definitely ETERNAL LOVE. ETERNAL LOVES: My grandmother and grandfather, Fred and Annie, my dear friend, JoAnn and her husband, Thomas, my aunt and uncle, Dee and Helen, (My "Tis"), my daughter-in-awe's mother and father, Rick and Barbara, my dear friends, Toby and Sallie, This couple's Eternal Love is also Paternal Love, Sibling Love, Friendship Love and the many pets along their journey. God Bless you, Toby...you are in our hearts forever. Eternal Loves (cont'd): James and Carol who I adore, Gaynell and Jimbo, married since we were kids or so it seems, and my childhood friend, who I love very much, Phyllis Ann and her husband, Bob. We all thought he was Robert Redford's twin. A smile and personality bigger than Dallas...and a love for PAnn about the same size.

A bit of trivia? Have you ever wondered where so many of the Valentine's go that are postmarked "Loveland?" When the boys were little we went to Colorado so they could learn to ski and enjoy the mountains. A huge change of scenery from our coastal hometown region of Galveston County. One year, we were able to visit and ski at Loveland, Co. It is not only beautiful but has the reputation of doing the largest post office business around February 14. So your trivia answer is Loveland, Co.

SIBLING LOVE: The spirit of love continues as Valentines are sent with sentimental verses and children exchanging valentine cards at school. I can remember, as though it was yesterday, standing in our kitchen, me the big sister at age 12, making my little sister, Janell, and little brother, Dwain, each a Valentine's box. Let's see...Janellie would have been about 7 and Dwain would have been about 6 so it was probably their first Valentine boxes.

Little Brother All Grown Up... I wasn't as crafty with the scissors and glue then, as I am now, because thats when we all realized I fainted at the sight of pain or blood. Not a particularly romantic thought but true all the same. If I say I'm going to faint...you best believe it and get out of the way. But I did love looking for that coveted cigar box that every little kid wanted to cover and mark on and make really special to have school friends place little notes and cards in throughout the day. Who really did secretly admire us but was too bashful to tell?

I only have a handful of friends and I covet them and wish I had more time to spend with them. I keep saying I'm going to work on that. Anyway, two that have been in my life for well over 25 years are particularly important: A female FRIEND THAT I LOVE and a male FRIEND THAT I LOVE. Neither even know the other. So be it our journey of life, where it takes us, who we love, yet sometimes paths do not even cross.

FEMALE FRIENDSHIP LOVE. Phyllis Ann...friends since my birthday, age 13. We met that year in school and went to the movies one Saturday (she didn't know it was my birthday) and we've been friends through all the years. We can go for months without talking, call one or the other on the phone, and BOOM...we pick up where we left off the last time we talked. We reminisce, advise, listen, philosophize, opinionize...you name it, we do it. She's a dear, talented friend who, like the song says "When you Need a Friend" she is there. Then there's my dear Sallie, who was married to a wonderful man (see Eternal Love) and Sallie has seen me through some of the highest of highs and the lowests of lows...and you know what, she's still here and I know, in my heart, that she will be with me forever in my journey. Here we are the night her beloved Toby was honored by our Alma Mata for the contributions that he gave back to our home town, the community, our children and civic life.

As was said in Eulogy: "There will be many little ladies who will miss Toby's hugs." A Valentine of many, but his Valentines were his girls, Sallie, Kristen and Tracey. Female Friendship Love (cont'd.) PAnn was there the night I met my boys' Dad. She had known Terry and his family for years because they stabled horses on her families acreage. They were riding buddies...barn buddies...it was a fluke meeting that night. She has been a constant in my life even when distance has caused absence, she was and is always in my heart. I know she will always be there...for the long run. PAnn has passed many of her talents on to her beautiful daughter, Stacey. A young lady with many, many talents. Now, the two of us, long time friends have 3 kiddos...all SS's.... SJS, SLS, SMS...so we share. MALE FRIENDSHIP LOVE: A boss first, friend forever. Not a thing romantic...just a dear, dear heart. My friend Stan, who is far away now, knows every secret, every love, every loss, every high and every low of my journey and I suspect that I know his. He's been along every step of the way and I know he will be there at the end of the journey. Always there. He's counseled, he's listened, he advises but he never judges. Happy Valentine's Day, SPS. FRIENDSHIP LOVE: NO MATTER THE GENDER In loving my friends, I am learning to trust, even at my lowest moments and when I am feeling vulnerable. My biggest weakness is letting my barriers down. I believe I MUST be strong and it is soooo exhausting but that is who I am and I'm okay with it. It's nice to have friends that I can be with and know I am not being judged. A new friend has taught me a lot about friendship. Somehow I made it to this age thinking that love was only about romance. No, love is also about friendship and loyalty. It's just taken me a lot longer to figure that out and I am thankful for this learning lesson...a lesson for me, the one with an unhealthy dose of mistrust. But, if you can trust the person based on their acts and not just their words, there is a foundation for friendship. That is...to trust. It is so easy to be fooled, but you know the saying: "fool me once"...well, I don't even want to go there in my Love-ly Blog. Friendship is what it is...not what is said...it's the actions. It’s something you do, and it's because you WANT to do it for the other person...nothing expected in return. And if you are lucky it all balances out. That doesn’t mean it’s always going to be in perfect harmony and balance at every turn. Sometimes you just “need a friend” and be there when you are needed by your friend. It's a mutual trust you can depend on. Thank you, Joe, for this valuable lesson in trust and friendship. MATERNAL LOVE: Can there ever be a deeper bond than that of a mother's love? I don't think so. As the saying goes: "From the Time They Placed You In My Arms You've Been in My Heart Forever." I have two of the most incredible young men and they have been the Sunshine of my life. A Mother's love is something that no one can explain, It is made of deep devotion and of sacrifice and pain, It is endless and unselfish and enduring, come what may For nothing can destroy it or take that love away . . . It is patient and forgiving when all others are forsaking, And it never fails or falters even though the heart is breaking . . . It believes beyond believing when the world around condemns, And it glows with all the beautyof the rarest, brightest gems . . . It is far beyond defining, it defies all explanation, And it still remains a secret like the mysteries of creation . . . A many splendoured miracle man cannot understand And another wondrous evidence of God's tender guiding hand. ~ Helen Steiner Rice NEW LOVE: Now my oldest is newly married to a beautiful young woman with an incredible smile and wonderful heart. They are expecting their first born on 7.04.09. A little boy. Check out Baby Progress Meter on the side! He will be treasured and adored by many. My son is now the second happiest I've ever seen him in his life, the first being when Lauren walked down the aisle and said "I Promise" and now waiting the birth of their firstborn (paybacks really are going to be fun, my son) and I am so grateful to his wife and her family. My son probably has a bit of all loves...New Love, about to have Parental Love, Love of Sport, and his LOVE OF PET: Ladies & Gentleman...meet Tag. Tag is Steven & Lauren's Boxer who has graced us with his presence not only in our homes but on the baseball field...and quite unexpectedly. Tag, you are in for a new love yourself... New Little Baseball Player. You just may have to move over and make a bit of room in your life.

speaking of Animals...Remember PUPPY LOVE.

Valentine's Day - Elementary years. I remember looking foward to that special day in elementary school when we crafted our Valentine mailbox for our schoolmates to sneak in those cute little Valentine cards during the day. Just wondering exactly which Valentine would be sent by our then "Puppy Love." I think in the 3rd grade my Puppy Love was named George.

That was also true in the 10th and 11th grade, but a different George. George (3rd Grade) and I had started 1st grade together. That would be George S. and I'm not sure, to the day we graduated from high school, if we ever said more than two words! Ever wander what happened to your first Valentine? Such sweet and tender days. Perhaps that's how my love of scrapbooking started. Making those sweet little Valentine boxes. I still like to make boxes and card and photo pages to remember all this.

Valentine's Day is celebrated by many throughout the world. It's the traditional day in the Western World where lovers express their feelings for each other by sending cards, or giving flowers or giving a box of chocolates. My first box of chocolates was when I was initially accused of being "high maintenance" which, of course, I am NOT. It was my junior year in high school and I was juggling two fellows (who me...yes, me). One brought red roses and Russell Stover and the other fellow (such a sweetheart) brought carnations and Whitman's chocolates. One was 17...the other 22 and a junior in college. Now, I'm going to set the record straight after all these years. First, I don't even like chocolate and second my favorite flower is pink roses. As I remember it, the roses were red but the carnations were pink. Somebody was trying to get it straight just didn't quite make it. While I was very fond of them both as a 17 year old could, let's say the Russell Stover/red roses, won my heart 2 years later, and gave me those two wonderful sons, Steven and Sam. God Bless You, Terrell ("Terry") Layne Sebesta, b. 1945 - d. 1991. Modern day Valentines include the heart-shaped Cupid, an alternative theory from Belarus that states the holiday originates from the story of Saint Valentine, who, being rejected by his love was so heartbroken that he took a knife to his chest and sent her his still-beating heart as a token of his undying love for her. So...there you go...heart-shaped cards sent as a tribute of overwhelming passion and suffering. As a single adult, I've had my very own Cupid, my sweet friend, Carol. She has played Cupid to many. She's definitely not a meddler...she just wants everybody to be as happy and in love as she is with her sweetheart, James. A marriage I've long admired. Heck the only time I've ever seen them raise their voices to each other I was the only one crying! I believe her record holds that she has fixed up 13 girlfriends, 12 have married and, well, I'll let you guess who is #13 and not married, though she has fixed me up 6 times. I've met some really nice gentlemen, they've met some really nice ladies and seem to be happy and in marital bliss. At least it looked that way on the day her daughter, Melissa married. At the wedding, there was an entire dance dedicated to the couples Carol had played matchmaker for and there I was...Little Miss Wallflower. Definitely "Cupid, Draw Back Your Bow" is my Valentine's dedication to Carol. She's a wonderful friend, a devoted wife, mother and MiMi to her grandson, Caden. She's going to give me Grammie lessons for the next several months. So for all my favorite people, just remember the famous words of Charlie Brown:

HAPINESS IS ANYONE AND ANYTHING THAT'S LOVED BY YOU. ~ Charlie Brown

OF COURSE: Out of his love for Lucy, one of his all time favorites: NOTHING TAKES THE TASTE OUT OF PEANUT BUTTER QUITE LIKE UNREQUITED LOVE...but let's not go there either. It's a Love-ly Day and I hope your Valentine's Day has been as special as you are all to me and that your Valentine evening is full of love.

Seal a letter with a wish and a kiss!

~ Babs